We are always busy.
Going from one place to the next, meeting with this person or that, not ever slowing down. For anything.
I am realizing I love staying busy. I love to run. I love to go, go, go and not stop. I am so much in this pace of life, that if I am not busy, I feel like something is wrong or out-of-place. I am then, forced to create a “to do list” to work myself up into a state of busyiness again.
I drink coffee so I can think faster.
I run so my heart rate will be increased. (it’s not a work out until it’s at least 180 for 20 minutes)
I worry so my mind has things to obsess over. (what if this, i hope that, maybe here, maybe there)
I don’t know how to go slow and to be okay with open, “non-productive” periods of time. I don’t know how to be goal-driven by the Lord and not by my to do list. I wrote this poem in 10th grade that I remember so vividly. The last words in the poem were…”my red-hot soul screams…STOP” These words have been reappearing in my life over the past year. Is God asking me to stop? Am I ignoring Him, because I know better? There is so much work to be accomplished on earth. So many goals to be reached. I have things I want to do. Things that are important to me. The bigger question for me at this time is:
Who is setting my goals? Me; or My God.
Do you struggle with these thoughts/questions? What answers have you come to? How are you doing with slowing down and following the Lord’s leading? What makes you feel satisfied when you come to the end of a day?